As a victim of a drunk driver, Shelly was seeking support and joined our online support group two years ago. Shelly agreed to share part of her story with our readers as she understands that sharing her recovery may help other survivors move forward. I am sharing her journey with you through a blog specifically dedicated to her beloved dachshund, “Widget”, who tragically lost her life due to an impaired driver. Many supportive and inspirational conversations take place in the Crash Support Network Group on a daily basis with survivors of motor vehicle crashes and Shelly has been an active participant sharing not only her struggles but her victories as well.
The Day I Want To Forget
My accident was October 17, 2018 around 9:30pm and I was a victim of a drunk driver. I was leaving work after a walk-in emergency and my shift was supposed to be over at 8pm. My dachshund “Widget” was in the car with me on my way home. We were going around a curve when we were hit head on by a drunk driver (I found out after that he was over two times the legal limit). After the impact I remember thinking “that did NOT just happen” then looked to my passenger seat where Widget had been. She wasn’t there and suddenly realized that she was killed instantly. I got myself out of the car to try and see if the other driver was ok and realized quickly that I couldn’t walk. I looked down and my right shoe was missing and my foot was covered in blood. I thought I should probably sit down and wait for help.
I laid in the grass thinking “I could go to sleep right now, and everything will be ok”. The police came to the scene and I started screaming for someone to check my dog, as well as my husband’s phone number. I’ve had over 13 surgeries for a fractured calcaneus and surrounding bones. They wanted to amputate my leg that night, but didn’t because the Orthopedic Doctor wasn’t in the hospital at that time. I was cut across my abdomen from the seatbelt from hip to hip, the skin and fat on my stomach were degloved from my body wall. I suffered several broken ribs and a severely bruised heart and lungs. The doctors told me the only thing that stopped my ribs from puncturing my heart was the fact that I have large breasts (apparently my big boobies helped). I was in the ICU for weeks and the total time in between the hospital and rehabilitation was a month. I have been diagnosed with anxiety, severe PTSD, and depression. I used to ride horses, motorcycles and hike all the time. I can’t ride either horse or a motorcycle anymore.
Painful Reminders
I’m now disabled due to a severe foot/ankle injury from my accident and for some reason random people come up to me and ask some variation of “What’s wrong with your leg?”…. What if I walked up to someone and said “What’s wrong with your face?” Who does that? I answer honestly saying my foot was basically amputated in an accident as I was a victim of a drunk driver, oh and by the way my dog was killed in the accident” (but thanks for pointing out the one thing that I hate about myself most of all) I know today’s society says “I’d rather you ask than stare” but when I’m out having a good day or trying to do my job I don’t need a reminder of the worst day of my life. Thanks!
Between the high’s and lows, Shelley has even shared some fun posts with the members of our group. She wrote: “What’s the funniest thing that has happened to you BECAUSE of your accident? I’ll start. At my last Physical Therapy appointment my husband came with me to “celebrate” and while he was talking to my Physiotherapist, I overheard them talking about my progress etc. Then I hear Chris (my husband) say “Hey, I’m good with where she is physically right now as she can’t run away from me”. I almost fell over laughing. My Physiotherapist, Paul just replied with “we aim to please“. It definitely made and still makes me giggle! Let’s all have a laugh at what otherwise is some shitty times 
As always, I love all of you and you make my day brighter just for being here!”
I Praise My Boss For Being So Understanding
Before I was a victim of a drunk driver, I was an orthopedic surgery nurse at a very progressive animal hospital. I have multiple credentials, my job was my life. I am permanently disabled as a result of this crash caused by a drunk driver and I can no longer stand for the 3-4 hour surgical procedures. My boss/practice owner is more than amazing. He made a position in the hospital for me as a Pharmacy Technician. Recently an inventory management position opened up and he pushed me to take it. I turned it down many times thinking “If I take it I’ll never get back to surgery”. I knew I couldn’t do it anymore but didn’t want to make it official. After many interviews, he approached me again, asking me to come up with MY terms for taking the job. And boy did I come up with terms! Which he accepted. Every. Single. One. Of them!
So long story short, after 20 years in the field I have a title, my name plate as well as my service dog’s name plate on the door and a “Zen/Relax” area on my desk in my own office. While I do miss surgery, I’m so glad he valued me as an employee enough to put up with the “after accident me”!
Shelly spent a month in rehabilitation, has undergone over 13 surgeries to re-build her body and suffered tremendous loss. We are so thankful that Shelly found our online support group as sharing stories can be quite powerful. They move us, inspire us and motivate us. Shelly lives in New Jersey with her husband who has been her cheerleader throughout the entire process and her service dog, Aurora. We thank Shelly for sharing her story with us and wish her positive healing as she continues to recover from this life changing crash.
(Pictured below is Widget)
Drunk drivers are one of the most dangerous drivers on the road. It is so important that we, as drivers, look out for one another and if you spot an impaired driver, please call the police and report them.
This article is also featured in our 2021 Spring Issue of Sharing our Recovery.
Are you a survivor of a motor vehicle crash and interested in sharing your story with us? We would love to hear from you! Please email us at info@crashsupportnetwork.com.
Dawne McKay is a survivor of a horrific crash that changed her life forever and her advocacy continued in 2018 as she became a Crash Survivor Blogger. Dawne is also the author of the book, “Talk Crash to Me – What to Expect After Surviving a Collision and How to Manage Your Recovery” which is available for purchase on Amazon.
The Crash Support Network is a unique one-of-a-kind website consisting of an online support group, a crash survivor blog, a quarterly newsletter, “Sharing Our Recovery” as well as highly informative articles. Our platform is based on relationship-building and puts the needs of survivors first by creating a helpful resource for victims and survivors of motor vehicle crashes.
