How many of us remember a “365”? Years ago in Canada, a 365 was similar to what they call a learners permit today and when I was 16, I got my 365. It consisted of a written test and if you passed, you were able to drive a car with a licensed driver beside you at any given time and on any type of roadway. I remember feeling on top of the world that day and decided my next step would be to take the Young Drivers of Canada Program where a licensed and highly experienced driver used their own car to teach you how to drive. Fast forward to 2022, and a learners permit consists of numerous stipulations but back then if you passed a written test you were good to go as long as you were with a licensed driver.
I had a great teacher and months into the course, I was ready to take the plunge to see if I get my driver’s license. I did everything right that morning except I was extremely nervous at the beginning of the exam and as soon as I pulled out of the parking lot, I was driving 10 over the speed limit for less than 5 minutes. Even though I perfected everything else during my driving exam including parallel parking…he failed me.
I Got My License When I Was 25
I think my driving instructor was more upset than I was that day because I do recall her going over to have a chat with the man that took me out for my test but getting my license that day wasn’t meant to be. For nine years after that day, I put myself through college while holding down three part time jobs all without a driver’s license. Back then it was all about busses, car-pooling, trains and walking that helped me commute and hold my jobs. If someone were to ask me “why didn’t you go back right away and try for your license again?” I would have to say that I really don’t have an answer as to why I didn’t go right back but when I turned 25, I decided it was time to try again. This time, it was a piece of cake and I did everything right. I was a licensed driver at 25.
When I think back, I really loved driving and when I say love… I mean Love with a capital “L”. Nice sunny warm days with the windows down ..playing a favourite tune was a weekend ritual for me not to mention feeling the independence of having my first car which was a Pontiac Sunbird and I remember falling in love with it as soon as I saw it. Driving in my car was “my alone time” and driving was never an issue for me and I was good at it.
Cars came and went and 19 years later, I had just downsized my Honda SUV for a Suzuki SX4 (as seen in the Crash Support Network’s logo below) and although it was a smaller and more economical vehicle, it didn’t take long for this little car to grow on me. A month into driving my new car, I found myself driving into work one morning and life had different plans for me that day. I was stopped to make a left hand turn and a distracted driver in an SUV rear ended me at a high rate of speed and pushed me into the path of a transport truck. Never did I know that on that particular morning as they whisked me away to a trauma hospital, that driving a vehicle would never be the same for me again.
It Was So Hard Getting Back into a Vehicle
From the very moment my crash happened, it was so hard getting back into a vehicle. Ask any crash survivor and they will tell you the exact same thing. As written in their article Driving Anxiety is Real, Martin Law Office suggests that you should never be afraid to ask for help. They also suggest that you ask your family doctor for referrals and resources. “Reaching out may be your first, best step to road recovery and independence.”
Two years into my recovery and I still had no interest at all about purchasing another vehicle. I could drive but I was anxious. Purchasing a new car was the last thing on my mind until I saw a very large vehicle at the end of someone’s driveway with a for sale sign on it that caught my eye. I remember the feeling was right and I instantly fell in love with an H2 Hummer. Yes! An H2 Hummer! The Hummer car is a civilian model of a popular military vehicle, called the Humvee.
All I could think about was….my goodness, nothing would hit me in that machine! Oh the fun I had that with that hummer. I felt secure, safe and on top of the world. I was back to driving independently and I am so glad we stopped that day to take a look. Hummers of course are definitely not economical so I decided that after a year or so, to sell it and focus on getting something else but I will never forget how that hummer encouraged me to get back behind the wheel and I will be forever grateful. I loved that humvee!
Getting Back Behind the Wheel Takes Time
Getting back to driving is difficult after a crash. I think back to my old life when I was able to drive well over an hour each way to get into work and it was never a problem. The majority of my job at the time consisted of being on the road traveling and now a long drive is a struggle. I recall numerous times watching other drivers smiling while they walked out to their car with a bounce in their step and the confidence I witnessed when I saw them get behind the wheel of their car as I recovered. I was envious as I watched them pull away – I wanted that same feeling again. Sure, I still put on music from time to time and roll a window down but it’s just not the same feeling as it was before. I also no longer feel comfortable driving on a multi highway as I once did but that’s okay because I am able to drive and I am happy for that as a lot of crash survivors cannot drive at all.
We need to take our time getting back behind the wheel of a vehicle and if you are having difficulty, fortunately, there is hope. PiOT Occupational Therapy Services explains that driver rehab and adaptive driving equipment can make a world of difference for those with conditions that make it difficult or impossible to operate a standard vehicle after surviving a motor vehicle crash. Read more in their article about how Driver Rehabilitation Can Be Beneficial.
Where ever you are in your road to recovery, it’s completely normal to be fearful of getting back behind the wheel of a vehicle and may it bring you some comfort to know that you are not alone.
S. Dawne McKay is a survivor of a horrific crash that changed her life forever. Dawne shares her personal journey as a Crash Survivor Blogger and also collaborates with crash survivors as Guest Bloggers allowing them an opportunity to share their stories. Dawne is also the author of the book, “Talk Crash to Me – What to Expect After Surviving a Collision and How to Manage Your Recovery” which is available for purchase on Amazon.
The Crash Support Network is a unique one-of-a-kind website consisting of an online support group, a crash survivor blog, a quarterly newsletter, “Sharing Our Recovery” as well as highly informative articles. Our website is based on relationship-building and puts the needs of survivors first by creating a helpful resource for victims and survivors of motor vehicle crashes.
