Last summer, I met another crash survivor for coffee.  She has been a member of the Crash Support Network Group for quite some time and I got lucky.  She only lived a few kilometres from me.  I cannot begin to tell you what it felt like to sit with someone who could completely understand what we go through in our recovery journeys.  After exchanging our stories and experiences, she confided in me that there was one thing she regretted which took place shortly after she survived a life changing motor vehicle crash.  When the words surfaced, I must admit, at first, I was not sure what she meant.  “I wish I didn’t creep facebook”.

I sat in silence and waited for her to explain as I was not sure if she meant that she regretted having a profile on facebook.  To my surprise, she began to tell me that when she retained her personal injury lawyer and received her copy of the Statement of Claim which indicated the name of the driver of the vehicle that caused her life altering crash, she began to creep.

What is Creeping?

Creeping refers to “stalking” someone on social media, which typically means checking them out or following what’s going on in their life on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Linkedin.  Creeping means browsing someone’s timeline, status updates and various online bios to find out more about them.  Most social media platforms allow people to check profiles out without notifying that user that someone has looked at their timeline or personal profile data.  Of course, there are limits to creeping on Facebook.  Users can set their privacy profiles so that only their friends can see what they have posted.  Similarly, insurance companies may “creep” a plaintiff’s facebook profile in the same manner to search for information that they can later use against the plaintiff in litigation.

Once she was aware of the name of the driver, she started to go online through facebook to find out what this person was all about.  Where did this person work?   Did they post images of the crash?  Has the driver ever been charged before? Were they injured in the crash or were they carrying on with their life like nothing happened while she continued to have her life put on hold for several years attending medical appointments?  Legitimate questions that all of us deserve to have the answers to.

I Still Have Anger Towards the Driver

Human nature is curious and I must admit, I did the same thing.  Once I read the driver’s name that caused my life to change in a matter of seconds on the Statement of Claim, I also went online to see what the driver was all about.  When I came across the driver’s facebook profile, I did click on it and skimmed through a few of her posts but her profile was private so I could not see much.  When I saw her happy life in a couple of images, it was very short lived for me as I realized my time would be better spent focusing on my recovery.  I decided right there and then that I had to put that driver behind me and to try my best to never think about her again.  The only time this driver ever pops into my mind is when I am experiencing a brutal pain day which usually comes a handful of times a year …11 years later.  The anger that I have towards the driver on my brutal pain days is real and it is justified.

My friend and fellow crash survivor recently told me that she has not creeped the defendant’s facebook profile for seven (7) months and that is definitely something to be proud of.  It can be destructing to our emotional well being when we creep the driver that caused our crash.  She realized that by creeping, she was actually sabotaging her own mental recovery.  I will even go far as to say, that if you do creep and find out information about the driver that caused your crash, you may be surprised to find out that they may live in the same town or city as you.  You must never approach them or make any type of contact as it could be detrimental to your motor vehicle claim, your lawsuit and your well being.

Don’t Have Regrets

When you share information about your claim or personal injury lawsuit on social media, always remember that it becomes public knowledge.  Venting your frustrations online, providing updates about your case or sharing your anger towards the driver that caused the crash could result in the insurance company undermining your claim and it can be used against you.  Being involved in a motor vehicle crash can be terrifying and the pain and emotional trauma of serious injuries can be devastating, and lifelong.  I personally understand that we all want to vent our frustrations when we are injured in a life changing crash by no fault of our own and left to face a long road to recovery but if you put your frustrations in writing online or continue to creep the driver on social media, it can have serious consequences.

Trust me when I say you will have a lot of regrets which I mention in my blog My Journey Home to Recover where I talk about the “dreaded what if’s”.  We have already had our lives altered in more ways than we can count, so try not to add any more regrets.  If you have hired a personal injury lawyer, you have filed a claim so let the lawyer do their job in seeking justice on your behalf so you can focus on your recovery.

This blog is dedicated to a brave crash survivor by the name of Susan who is continuing to heal after surviving a horrific motor vehicle crash. She courageously shared her regret with us in hopes that it will deter others from making the same mistake.

S. Dawne McKay is a survivor of a horrific crash that changed her life forever.  Dawne shares her personal journey as a Crash Survivor Blogger and also collaborates with crash survivors as Guest Bloggers allowing them an opportunity to share their stories.  Dawne is also the author of the book, “Talk Crash to Me – What to Expect After Surviving a Collision and How to Manage Your Recovery” which is available for purchase on Amazon.

The Crash Support Network is a unique one-of-a-kind website consisting of an online support group, a crash survivor blog, a quarterly newsletter, “Sharing Our Recovery” as well as highly informative articles. Our website is based on relationship-building and puts the needs of survivors first by creating a helpful resource for victims and survivors of motor vehicle crashes.